We Indians have given many groundbreaking innovations to the world. And
break-up party is one of them.
Yes, you read it right.
Break-up party is an Indian gift to the world! Sometimes, the very
thought of how innovative we, as a nation, are fills me with a lot of pride,
gives me goose bumps literally! The world should learn from us, I tell myself!
So a small quiz. Who set the trend of throwing break-up parties in
India?
Imtiyaz Ali’s Love Aaj Kal?
Wrong!
The trend was set long ago. Our country has been throwing lavish
break-up parties for around seven decades now! And you think the concept is
just catching up!
We have been celebrating our break-up every year since 1947. And tomorrow i.e. August
15, 2015, we would be having our 69th break-up party.
But that’s called as Independence Day, you might be thinking. Yes, it
is! Everyone knows it as the Indian Independence Day. That’s how it was sold to
the masses, otherwise it would have been impossible to sustain this ritual year
after year.
But I call it a break-up. Each year, we celebrate our break-up on August
15th.
Why I call it a break-up is because I think we celebrate our hatred for
Pakistan more than our independence from the British. The vice versa is equally
true, the other party celebrates it a day in advance.
Isn’t it surprising that we are too amiable with those who ruled us and
we hate those who were a part of us till yesterday!
So, we celebrate our break-up with our beloved with loads of enthusiasm.
This is what we’ve been doing for decades.
Not that it was easy to come to terms with the break-up. We went through
terribly painful and ugly times. Break-up left us blue for years. However, we
bounced back and ensured that we celebrate the break-up.
And we also ensured that year on year the break-up anniversary
celebrations are more lavish than the previous ones. Mind you, it’s not an easy job. You will at least take a decade to make
arrangements like we do. It’s the years of hard work that’s helped us gain an
expertise in planning and hosting a successful break-up party.
You can’t even remotely imagine what it takes to plan and host a
successful break-up party. And if you are one of those small developing
nations, forget about it! Do you even know how much money is needed to host
such a pompous show? Forget it, if you have a money crunch. Sit in your living
rooms and just watch our break-up celebration live on your television sets.
Fascination Continues Decades after the Split
A relationship changes over years. Ours with Pakistan has also
experienced many changes. From Nehru-Gandhian arrangement to Modi-fication,
it’s been a roller-coaster ride!
Do I need to cite any incidences to justify this? I guess, no.
And the worse is neither of us let bygones be bygones. Even after
break-up we are still so fascinated with each other. I mean the fascination
takes time to die down!
Whether it’s a general discussion among common people or a so-called
parliamentary session, we love to blame Pakistan for everything that is wrong
in our country and I am sure it is the same on the other side as well.
We don’t want to lay that baggage down. It seems easier to spread
hatred, kill and die than to move past it and look for a solution.
Organizing a Break-up Party
It seems even I enjoy talking about break-up ;)
Just give you some quick tips on how to organize a grand break-up party:
1.
Remember it’s a party. And
you will have to keep things lively and colorful. You can’t look sad and dull.
Watch the live coverage tomorrow for more ideas.
2.
Color the Sky: We color
the sky. We ask our Air Force to spread colors in the sky. And don’t you forget
they rehearse for months. If you have gallons of fuel, then only you think of
attempting it.
Want to go a cheaper way?
Fly colorful kites. For your information, we do both!
3.
Make Sure Everyone Is On It: After
all, it’s a lavish party. And it sucks if people don’t participate. We invite
our army, school students, and state governments to perform at Red Fort
premises.
Yes, we spend the tax
payer’s money like water. After all, it’s a grand affair and our ex would also
be watching it. The very thought of how happy we are after the break up flares
him up.
4.
Invite Your Beloved: That’s
cool, no? Just imagine how amazing it is to have your ex invited to the party.
We also send invitations to our beloved. But it’s absolutely their choice to
accept or deny it.
5.
Have a Big Heart: Come on! You can’t be a jerk on such a
happy occasion. Have a big heart like us. We have also given them the liberty
to celebrate the break-up a day before.
Don’t you think it’s a right approach?
We are a progressive nation. No matter what’s going inside us, we look
cheerful. Instead of crying over our split from our beloved, we celebrate it,
each year more lavishly and with more enthusiasm.
We don’t conform.
We celebrate break-up and choose to live unhappily ever after.
