My Birthday Gift to Self

Birthdays are always special. No matter how old you turn. You feel excited and plan in advance as to how you’re going to spend this special day. As my birthday is approaching, a question keeps coming to my mind: how will I celebrate it this time?

I had no special plans until a friend shared his ideas on ‘birthday gifts to self’. Like every year, this year too I would have searched for a restaurant on Zomato and thrown a party. While this remains a tradition, I’m compelled to think outside the box.

What else will I gift myself? It won’t be a gadget for sure. An answer that immediately popped! After all, a gift doesn’t have to be tangible.

Then what?

I brainstormed for a couple of days. All alone.

I almost cut off from the outer world. Because only I know how I have changed over the years. What more changes I want in my life. Where my life is heading. Only I know my strengths and my weaknesses. Only I know my deeds. Therefore, only I can give myself a priceless gift.

After days of deep introspection, I finally know what I want for myself. I want a gift that is timeless. Something that can be utilized right in the moment and in the future. Something that I can fall back onto each time my life runs haywire. A gift that I would want to give myself every moment, every year till I live.

So, here’s what I’m gifting myself:

1.      Acceptance of changes

I realize that I’m not very open to life’s changes. I hold on to things tightly, only to see them slipping away from my hands. I don’t accept changes easily. I have always learned things the hard way.

So, why not show some kindness to myself and make my life easier? Changes are painful, But not as painful as feeling stuck. The biggest limitation is the one we make up in our mind.

How do I remove this barrier? By

§  Setting my mind free

§  Not overthinking

§  Figuring out what’s worth my attention

2.      Mastering the art of knowing ‘when to stop trying’

When you pursue something, you give your best to make things fall in place. It’s specially true for the matters close to heart. But sometimes, even after trying hard, they don’t bring desired fruits. And in this process we often forget that we can’t keep hanging onto something for too long. We can’t allow ourselves to be crippled by disgust, frustration and stress. We need to understand that there’s a difference between trying and holding on to.

There are some things that aren’t meant to be. And that’s okay. Holding on to them neither takes away my worries nor does it help me achieve them. Either way I suffer. So, this year, I will let go of the things that I was holding on. If they are meant to be, they’ll find a place in my life. I will make a conscious effort to master the art of knowing ‘when to stop trying’.

3.      Letting go of my guilt

Gender plays an important role here. Women have the habit of feeling guilty about almost everything that’s happening in their lives. I too am not an exception.

Though habits die hard but I’m committed to let go of the guilt I carry. I’m not defined by a choice or a mistake I made in the past. Yes, I may be accountable for something that didn’t go right. But I won’t criticize myself for anything and everything that’s been happening in my life.

Since no one else lives my life, no one has the right to invalidate my thoughts and actions. Nor would I let anyone make me feel guilty.

These are the gifts I’ll be giving myself on my birthday. I will start anew.